The Sorceress's Knight
by Sembri
Summary: [One-Shot][Songfic]Seifer's thoughts and reasons behind his actions during the time while under Ultimecia's control.


First, thanks to everyone that read my last fanfic! I really wasn't going to write another one for a while, but you guys convinced me otherwise. Hope this one lives up to your standards!!

Thanks to Imp for pointing out my misspellings!

Disclaimers: I don't own Final Fantasy or its characters. Song: Limp Bizkit - Behind Blue Eyes

The Sorceress's Knight

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No one knows what it's like

To be the bad man

To be the sad man

Behind blue eyes

And no one knows

What it's like to be hated

To be faded to telling only lies

They don't understand. They never have. "Poor Seifer, he'll never become a SeeD." It's like I'm cursed. It's not like I chose this fate or anything, Ultimecia chose me. She chose me because I'd do anything to get back what she stole. They all despise me. They think that I'm doing this of my own free will. I must get them back, and she knows I'd give anything. If I must endure everything they throw at me, from their harsh words to their weapons, I will get them back. I've done some things in my past that I'm definitely not proud of, but I will never be able to forgive myself for the things I've done while under her.

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But my dreams they aren't as empty

As my conscious seems to be

I have hours, only lonely

My love is vengeance

That's never free

Yes, she stole my dreams. She has them sealed away. Reality sucks, my dreams keep me from seeing the horrible truths around me. Now, I must sit on my own, and think about what I have done. I hate it. I hate what I have become. But I must persevere. I must get them back. I must fight for the sorceress, even if it is against my heart.

No one knows what its like

To feel these feelings

Like I do, and I blame you!

No one bites back as hard

On their anger

None of my pain woe

Can show through

They all hate me. They feel like I've betrayed them. Fujin and Raijin have even left me now. I can't say I blame them. I've never exactly told them the truth, so they probably believe the same as Squall. I even forced Fujin to open up in front of someone she didn't fully trust. I thought the SeeD's mouths were gonna hit the floor. I still felt bad, though. Fujin only talks like a normal person around Raijin and me. Ultimecia has so much to pay for. Come on, Squall, hurry up and kill her, I know you can. Kill the person who's caused everyone so much pain. But I still must act like a jerk and treat my friends like I hate them. I must to get my dreams back.

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No one knows what its like

To be mistreated, to be defeated

Behind blue eyes

No one know how to say

That they're sorry and don't worry

I'm not telling lies

I must act like my conscience doesn't bother me. In secret, when its just me and Ultimecia, my feelings run rampant. My eyes lose their attitude and my shoulders slump. If only Rin could see me now. She always felt like I was the person she felt could never be wrong. Sorry to disappoint you. I never was good enough for you, Rinny. Squall is perfect for you. I've lost the battle with myself, and I know I look like I'm always lost. I can't even begin to apologize to them. They don't understand me. Though I know its because of the act Ultimecia has me putting on. I want to tell them the truth, but for now, I'll just avoid it to keep from forfeiting my dreams.

__

No one knows what its like

To be the bad man, to be the sad man

Behind blue eyes.

One day, Squall, you'll see why I did what I did. Fight me now, I know you could never kill me. You remember that we were like brothers and that I still feel that way. Please, kill her so that we can all have our lives back. Then, I can finally tell you all what I've longed to since that day so long ago in Timber.

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My first songfic. In case you can't tell, it's during the time when Seifer is under Ultimecia's control. For the people who don't know or might have forgotten, at the end of disc two, Rinoa bends down over Seifer and he gets up and walks off. Squall later finds out that it was Ultimecia in Rinoa's body telling him that his dreams would be hers until her dream was a reality. And the day "so long ago in Timber" is when Seifer first left with Edea. Feedback please!

YuniesTwin


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